A Goldman Sachs Wish
(In the Style Of Edgar Guest's "A Patriotic Wish")
I'd love to work for Goldman Sachs
And play their Wall Street game;
I'd love to outsmart other guys
Put their returns to shame;
I'd love to tweak investing quirks
That generate big perks and smirks
That others can not claim.
When stocks go up
I'd make my vig,
And when they drop
Still make out big;
And even when the good times flee,
The government would bail me,
The government always bails me.
I'd love to work for Goldman Sachs
And not another bank;
These others' comp is just chump change
About that let's be frank;
And when it comes to bonuses,
While oozing out of onuses,
On top I'd always rank.
I'd peddle bonds
For short term gain,
Then buy them cheap
When their shines wane;
Let press and pols deride these deals,
My wealth would cushion all their squeals,
Big money all bad feeling heals.
I'd love to have a B-school
Bear my name in its address;
And maybe with the government
My presence I would bless;
I'd dump some cash on charity,
Bad odor this would wash off me
And ne'er mistakes confess.
Rejoice, you all
At my success,
Abetted, yes,
With your largesse;
Still there's no need your pains to share,
'Cause truth be told I just don't care,
'Cause truth be told I just don't care.
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